I watched a move a couple of years ago with Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson called "The Bucket List". About old men, dying old men, who decide to hurriedly do everything they have ever wished before they croak. Cute. Didn't really pertain to me for I was forever young with all the time in the world on my side.
I totally get it now.
Don't get me wrong, I am not...1. an old man and 2. not getting ready to croak (as far as I know). There is just this sense of daredevilry, absolute 'I don't give a f**k' freedom that is happening right now that cannot be denied. On scales big and small.
And I don't mean like in the old days. Having sex without a condom and employing the pull out method. Freely mixing all sorts of liquors while cocktailing for hours sometimes days on end. Fully sitting on a public toilet seat. With no paper down. In a dive bar or questionable eating establishment. Pshaw.
It goes from something as simple and uncomplicated as additional cheese on my pizza (the hell with the Gout!) to something that is guaranteed to put me in an early grave if it goes, well, wrong (Plummeting to the earth outside of a plane (aka skydiving)? Sure.). Swimming immediately after eating? Getting needled and inked in 'sensitive' areas? Parasailing off a raft in the middle of the ocean without true professional assistance? Been there. Done that.
Now, I watch videos of bungee jumping and think YES. I see stories of people hang gliding off the rockiest cliff on the planet with only a few hours of instruction and think HELL YEAH. I see the young men diving off of naturally formed rocky ledges and think *chest pound* I AM A YOUNG MAN. Can't catch my breathe due to the excitement. And not totally due to the lithe bodies hitting the warm water.
Not that I was ever a mousy woman scared of my own shadow. Challenges have always turned me on. I have always forced myself to do the impossible, to attempt the unachievable, to risk all that there is to risk personally and professionally. But something about this decade just makes me feel...crazily free. Completely, unabashedly untethered. The world is really my oyster, throw caution to the wind, all that jazz.
And no, I don't need to 'speak to somebody'.
It's not that you're in a rush; you're in a 'now'. You realize that all of the previous years have gone by pretty damn quickly and now is the time to get 'er done. That well maintained plot underneath the beautiful cherry tree or that oven fit for one is not a dream but a reality. And you can't live forever. Not just yet.
xo,
Fabulously Fourty(ish)
I totally get it now.
Don't get me wrong, I am not...1. an old man and 2. not getting ready to croak (as far as I know). There is just this sense of daredevilry, absolute 'I don't give a f**k' freedom that is happening right now that cannot be denied. On scales big and small.
And I don't mean like in the old days. Having sex without a condom and employing the pull out method. Freely mixing all sorts of liquors while cocktailing for hours sometimes days on end. Fully sitting on a public toilet seat. With no paper down. In a dive bar or questionable eating establishment. Pshaw.
It goes from something as simple and uncomplicated as additional cheese on my pizza (the hell with the Gout!) to something that is guaranteed to put me in an early grave if it goes, well, wrong (Plummeting to the earth outside of a plane (aka skydiving)? Sure.). Swimming immediately after eating? Getting needled and inked in 'sensitive' areas? Parasailing off a raft in the middle of the ocean without true professional assistance? Been there. Done that.
Now, I watch videos of bungee jumping and think YES. I see stories of people hang gliding off the rockiest cliff on the planet with only a few hours of instruction and think HELL YEAH. I see the young men diving off of naturally formed rocky ledges and think *chest pound* I AM A YOUNG MAN. Can't catch my breathe due to the excitement. And not totally due to the lithe bodies hitting the warm water.
Not that I was ever a mousy woman scared of my own shadow. Challenges have always turned me on. I have always forced myself to do the impossible, to attempt the unachievable, to risk all that there is to risk personally and professionally. But something about this decade just makes me feel...crazily free. Completely, unabashedly untethered. The world is really my oyster, throw caution to the wind, all that jazz.
And no, I don't need to 'speak to somebody'.
This loss of fear (even if you've never had any), this influx of what the hell excitement, is exhilarating. Running with the bulls in Pamplona. Tied of simply reading about it. Swimming with sharks. Not the businessmen but the real McCoys. Eating spicy food after - yes, after- midnight. Singing out loud in public comfortable that you are piercing ear drums and busting windows (and not in a good way). Do it. Do it. DO IT. *Pounding the top of my desk while flinging my head from side to side*
It's not that you're in a rush; you're in a 'now'. You realize that all of the previous years have gone by pretty damn quickly and now is the time to get 'er done. That well maintained plot underneath the beautiful cherry tree or that oven fit for one is not a dream but a reality. And you can't live forever. Not just yet.
xo,
Fabulously Fourty(ish)
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